Movie Review: Transporter 3

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It’s always a toss up trying to decide the top sequels in the history of film. Is it Godfather II? Superman II? Porky’s II? Then of course, you have your abundance of sequel’s sequels….Mission Impossible III…Evil Dead III (Army of Darkness)…Back To The Future III. But, once in a lifetime there comes a film that just screams, please make three of me. That, friends, is Transporter 3.

Sure, you might be right while you’re reading and sipping on your hot cocoa. Do I really need to see Transporter 3? I missed the second one. Am I going to be all screwed up and not be able to follow along? Have no fear, we’re here to tell you that if you can follow a simple story line of a man getting back into his car…you can handle the magic of Transporter 3.

Let’s just get over the list shall we. We have the movie star good looks of Jason Statham buckled snugly into his seat belt again. Check. We have possibly the best name of a director with a few credentials to his name, i.e. Olivier Megaton. Check. We’ve got the hot Ukrainian chick who is hoping this is her big career move as Mr. Statham’s love interest, i.e. Natalya Rudakova. That’s a big check, baby.

Yuppers. This puppy has got what you’re looking for. Sure, you need to have just a slight tinge of that whole suspension of disbelief thing. You know the one, where you have to believe it’s plausible for a guy to be forced to do a bunch of stuff or his bracelet that is attached to his wrist will blow him up real good if he gets too far from his brand new Audi A8. Also, that the sweet Audi will be smashed, crashed, bashed, and still seem to look like it came right out of a car wash. We’re talking some serious marketing from Audi. That beyond anything else, takes some serious cajones.

Other than that, we have kicking, punching, and head smashing in just about every form you could possibly imagine. Somehow, Mr. Statham gets his shirt off while he’s fighting, more than Hulk Hogan dealing with his divorce papers. This thing is off the hook.

So, grab your friends, party like it’s 1999…and check out a midnight showing after you hit the bars. That will probably make it seem a lot better. Ummm…that’s what we did.

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